But that is not going to happen today.
Today is a very blue day.
As many of you know, we miscarried (what a horrible word!) the end of February. Now, each month, when it is clear that we are not pregnant, I have this horrible feeling of disappointment, and feel like sitting down and sobbing until I cannot cry any longer, but I don't because I don't want to freak out Miss Pear.
I am so thankful that the Lord has blessed us with Miss Pear. She is a constant delight! On Monday, after breakfast, I left her Bible open at my place while I washed her hands with a damp cloth, and then set her down. She immediately climbed into my chair and said, "(Miss Pear)
Yet part of me aches each month. Part of me is bitterly disappointed each month.
Yet I keep reminding myself that God has a plan for us, and it is a good plan. My head understands that, but my heart is having a hard time today.
![[the-library.jpg]](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZlgbkzq4RFoBQc3lUKiqnqmqJKJ_OvF8tsg4xUtv3A6fDdV2iaYc-f2GJHGXNypj1LPHuqZ8UPUpK7aA0NY7wN5lyaEYmIfFqYSDIxPYzg_rBBouE60A0LABiXUbdI73MhHN24Xb7-nc/s1600/the-library.jpg)
8 comments:
I'm so sorry, Mrs. Pear. Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way.
I did not know. I am so sorry. Wish there were some perfect words, but offering you a heart full of prayers.
I feel your pain and pray you will feel the Lords abundant peace. Bless you.
((Hugs))
It's all in His perfect timing. Keep trusting Him. :)
Blessings,
Mrs. C
I understand what you mean. I wish I could say I didn't still do this after almost 4 years. I find it comforting that God feels your pain with you and understands.
Oh, Mrs. Pear. My heart goes out to you.
Please know how many sisters in the Lord care about you and pray for your comfort.
Regards,
Trixie
I've posted several times recently regarding fertility challenges. I also moderated in the past for Hannah's Prayer.org. There are some really wonderful Christian ladies there who can relate to and understand your sorrow, because they've "walked a mile" in your shoes. I encourage you to stop by the website and check it out. The owner, Jenny Saake is also a published author, having written a book on the topic of fertility challenges.
Secondary infertility is in some ways more difficult than primary, as false guilt can be inflicted on you unintentionally by others. People also have difficulty understanding how some still feel the sorrow of fertility challenges after they adopt. It's very complicated, but God is in the midst of it.
Blessings,
~toni~
So sorry, Mrs. Pear. I would love to have more children as well, but health problems and my age prevent this. I keep hearing from other mothers that the minute you stop thinking about it, you become pregnant. When you are not trying, it happens. Keep the faith, you'll prevail.
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